Tatterday

Yesterday morning, I awoke to the sound of my dog tearing my bedside slippers to bits. My dog tears a lot of things to bits, so I couldn't pretend to be surprised that my slippers were the latest victim. I couldn't even really be mad, because those slippers, in the year that I'd owned them, had uglified to the point where I was just looking for an excuse to replace them. Thanks, Kodiak, for giving me the reason I needed. I set the slippers aside, got dressed, and vowed to clean up the mess he'd made of them when I got home.

Then, I went to work. And started thinking.

Up until that point, I thought I knew what I was going to wear for the last day of my Week of Wordplay Fashion Challenge. I actually had two options, of which I was planning to pick one at the last minute, depending on whether I went out or stayed home on Saturday. But on Friday afternoon, it suddenly occurred to me that the stay-home option didn't quite match the pattern of all the other words in the series. The other days had all been pronounced almost, but never exactly the same as the actual word. Here I might replace a vowel sound with a slightly different vowel sound, or there I might replace a consonant with a similar one.... But never had I used a perfect homophone, and I wasn't about to start now! That meant my original candidate for a lazy Saturday's theme ("Sadderday,") was too identical to the actual word for my strict rule-making conscience to abide.

"Sadderday," in case you were wondering, would have just been my usual homebody uniform of mismatched loungewear, last night's makeup, and unkempt hair—in other words, a pretty sad image. What I came up with for a replacement, though, was pretty much the same, but even sadder: Tatterday! Not only would I wear clothes that are mismatched and sloppy, I'd wear clothes that are downright tattered! Starting, of course, with my chewed-to-pieces unicorn slippers.

For the rest of the outfit, I used my flannel cat pajamas. These duds, probably almost 20 years old by this point, have definitely seen better days. Last year, a huge rip opened up in the back of the left shoulder. I thought they were a goner, but I couldn't bear to throw away such a historical artifact when the rest of them was still perfectly serviceable! Instead, I removed the front pocket and used it as a patch, attaching a scrap of it to the inside of the hole and sewing over both layers with a reinforcing grid of stitches.

Unless you're looking closely, you'd never know that this PJ top was once in veritable tatters.

By now you must have guessed that I did, indeed, stay home today (I actually have plans to go out for Repeal Day in the evening, but I could not think of a way to work that into my weekly theme, and besides, by then the day will be almost over!). But you're probably wondering what the theme would have been if I had actually decided to get dressed. Well, in that case, I would have gone with "Caturday"—which, conveniently, works with these cat pajamas as well. Two Saturday themes in one outfit! I truly outdo myself!

And with that, my Fashion Challenge is over, and none too soon! As much as I enjoy a good daily test of my fashion mojo, I'm a bit tired and ready for a break. You know what they say, "Seven days of puns make one weak!"